And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
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