that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
Randomize
