I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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