am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
birth control should be required to get into college
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
Randomize
