Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
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