i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Randomize
