just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
Randomize
