You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
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