I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
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