I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
Randomize
