I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize
