OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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