Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize