You know the @ sign on twitter? i wish there was one of those in real life so that the smokin' hot guy at the bar would know the slutty unbuttoning of my shirt was directed @ him, not @ his friend who looks like Mickey Rourke post-face melting
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
