Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
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