He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
the liver wants what the liver wants
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
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