k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
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