She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
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