Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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