Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
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