BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
Randomize