Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Randomize
