Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
