Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
The sad part is I didn't even want to get laid. I just wanted the emotional connection, but my vagina was screaming "TOUCH ME. TOUCH ME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE MY DADDY ISSUES ARE MUCH DEEPER THAN MY EMOTIONAL NEEDS!" Vodka has a way of getting me out of my emotions and gets me fucked every time.
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
Randomize