im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
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