Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize