I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
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