How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
Randomize
