So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
Randomize
