he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
You smell like stripper and shame
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
Randomize
