Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Randomize
