I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
Just pee around me
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
Randomize
