He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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