Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
I licked your asshole in confidence.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
She's better-looking with the mask on.
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