butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
Randomize