She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Randomize
