Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
