There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
Why are your pants in the freezer?
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
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