The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
