i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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