i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize