Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
