I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
Dick very happy bro
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
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