I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
I party with great urgency now.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
Randomize
