Three words: puerto rican gang bang
Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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