So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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