I was to big spoon the shit out of you right now
I'm so hungover and dru,k
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
I got inside last night via doggy door
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
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