What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
