stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
At least be KIND OF sobering up before you text me, I've told you before I don't speak vodka unless I've been drinking it with you.
PS WHY wasn't I drinking it with you? Dick.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
Randomize
