Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
Randomize
