I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
You're gonna be sprawled out basking in the sun working on your tan like a ridiculously hot iguana, and I'm gonna be here bundled up in about 72 layers just so I don't freeze my dick off looking like the Michelin man's gay cousin
i apologize, I may have called you an iguana
Mistakes were made
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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